January 14, 2011, 9:32am

What happens to the poor fish of the seven seas who become injured or ill? Are they left to float and flounder on the choppy waters, unattended and uncared for? Not if Aquaman can help it! For the Sea Sovereign operates an unusual underwater shelter and clinic for his finny friends—and they get all the medical attention they need by…CALLING DR. AQUAMAN!

Via Squidkid.

October 15, 2010, 1:35pm

happy friday!

December 11, 2009, 1:48pm

Well-trimmed beard? Octopus? Pocketwatch? That’s how you sell out back-to-back nights at Antone’s and stack the moms.

November 04, 2009, 11:41am

November 02, 2009, 10:04pm

More blatant cephalopodsploitation in advertising, this time for dental floss.

August 19, 2009, 10:15am

Forthcoming album art for formerly Austin-based art-doom band Giant Squid. Drawn by Maxx/Zero Girl artist Sam Keith.

August 17, 2009, 4:36pm

Another day, another fight to the death with a giant octopus.

Men Magazine, January 1956

Illustrated by Frank Soltesz

May 04, 2009, 9:39am

Fatal Adventure with an Octopus

May 01, 2009, 1:32pm

There is a certain etiquette that must be followed for fans that wish to throw octopuses onto the ice.

Beforehand, an octopus should be boiled for at least 20 minutes on high heat with a little lemon juice and white wine. This will mask the creature’s odor as well as reducing the amount of slime. A raw dead thrown octopus would result in a smelly ball that would stick to the ice upon impact and possibly leave an inky stain, while a well-boiled octopus will bounce and roll across the surface of the ice.

After the octopus has been properly prepared it must be smuggled into the ice arena, as it is against the law in Detroit (and other NHL cities) for a fan to throw anything onto the ice during a game. A preferred method is to wrap the octopus in plastic (a trash bag will do) and then wrap the package around one’s middle section to give the appearance of a beer belly.

The most appropriate time to throw an octopus onto the ice is after the national anthem is sung or after the Red Wings have scored a goal. The octopus must be thrown onto the ice surface in an area that is clear of all players. It is never acceptable to aim for opposing players. Tactics are also used to protect the identity of octopus-throwers from arena security. It is common practice for the hurler to ask the surrounding people to stand up with him to shroud the task in anonymity.

Experienced throwers grasp the octopus around the middle of its arms with the octopus’s head (or more correctly, its mantle) hanging down near the thrower’s knee and then swings the octopus with an overarm motion. Holding the octopus by the ends of its arms prior to the throw may result in the mantle of the octopus breaking off during the wind-up.

After successfully participating in this peculiar tradition, the octopus thrower is left with a tell-tale indicator: stinky hands. It is advisable to bring along a wet wipe and a slice of lemon to assist in removing the odor.

Via Wikipedia. Thanks to @kevrotti.

April 24, 2009, 12:52pm

Throwing the octopus is easy. More difficult is concealing the eight-legged creature until the toss is at hand, a skill that requires determination, luck and the ability to walk normally with 4 pounds of slimy cephalopod stuffed down your pants.

When Detroit drops in on Nationwide Arena Tuesday night in an attempt to further frustrate the Blue Jackets some among the Red Wings fans in attendance undoubtedly will have attempted to enter while packing octopus.

Some might even succeed, continuing a Detroit tradition dating to 1952 of throwing octopi on the ice during Red Wings games.

“I just sell it. What they do with it is up to them,” said Frank Gonzalez, owner of Frank’s Fish & Seafood Market in Columbus.

What they do with it is the second hurdle. The common method is to sneak the octopus through the turnstiles by slipping it into your trousers, a technique that Gonzalez does not understand.

“I wouldn’t want something moving around down there when you’re moving around,” he said, smiling.

“They’ve been creative,” said Eric Granger, general manager of Nationwide Arena. “We’ve caught them Saran-wrapped to the body.”

Most contraband carriers get caught before they reach their seats, having failed to elude the authorities, who conduct bag searches for every game and event.

But fans are not required to drop their drawers, so the danger always exists.

“We have not had one octopus thrown this season,” officials said, adding that arena personnel know what to look for after witnessing octopi hit the ice during previous seasons.

Those caught carrying an octopus must surrender it before being allowed to enter. Anyone who passes detection and manages to heave an octopus gets the immediate heave-ho.

During the 1995 playoffs, two Detroit seafood sellers tossed a 38-pound octopus onto the ice during the national anthem before Game 1 of the Western Conference Finals. A year later, they tossed a 50-pounder during the conference finals. The blob ended up displayed on the hood of the Zamboni between periods.

April 22, 2009, 5:10pm

The “Globular Blue Eyes” are worth the price of admission (which is only your obviously worthless time). But definitely stick it out for the choice bioluminescence footage around 3:11. Try to look past the questionable font choices. Vampire squid win again.

-Thanks to @GeoffG

January 14, 2009, 9:28am

Sharing a movie with an insensitive eight-armed animal may not be every woman’s perfect date. Renata Pronk did it for science, and made two significant discoveries.

Octopuses can watch television and understand at least some of what they see. However, they enjoy only high-definition programs.

In a second finding, the Macquarie University marine biology researcher resolved a long scientific debate, discovering that octopuses, despite their intelligence, lack individual personalities.

“The definition of personality,” she said, “is having repetition in your responses, for example, being consistently bold, or consistently shy, or consistently aggressive.”

To resolve the debate she collected 32 common Sydney, or gloomy, octopuses from Chowder Bay, near Mosman, and showed them a series of three-minute videos screened on a monitor in front of their tank.

One video featured a crab, an octopus delicacy. A second starred another octopus, while a third had a “novel object” they would not have seen: a plastic bottle swinging on a string. Miss Pronk then watched each octopus for any consistent response pattern, such as boldness or aggression. When the crab movie was screened “they jetted straight over to the monitor and tried to attack it”, she said, adding that was strong evidence they knew they were watching food. When the octopus movie was screened some became aggressive while others changed their skin camouflage or “would go and hide in a corner, moving as far away as possible”.

On viewing the swinging bottle, some puffed themselves up, just in case the object was a threat, while others paid no attention.

But significantly, when the experiment was repeated over several days, she found no consistent response from any octopus. Such random responses implied octopuses have no individual personalities.

She suspected previous efforts to show movies to octopuses failed because their sophisticated eyes were too fast for the 24-frame per second format of standard-definition video.

“They would have seen it as a series of still pictures,” said Miss Pronk, who had success using high-definition, operating at 50 frames per second.

She confessed that her work made it difficult to dine on octopus. “I know how smart they are. They are beautiful animals.”

December 22, 2008, 9:15am