H8 U Dr. T!

From “The 5000 Fingers of Dr. T” (1953)

Thanks to @kevrotti

October 02, 2009, 3:03pm

Mohawks help to get your kids used to killer robots.

September 14, 2009, 4:01pm

Presenting the HyGenie Complete Funball washing system

The UV Super Mini HyGenie is engineered and constructed to provide peak performance day after day. Your ballpool will stay cleaner with less effort and downtime. Balls are vacuumed from the ballpool, enter the stainless steel wash chamber, bathed in antibacterial detergent and pass through ultraviolet light. Then, the balls are blown back to the ballpoool. The process is continually automatic.

Independent biological laboratory tests confirm that the Mini HyGenie patented cleaning process, which combines antibacterial detergent washing and ultraviolet light removes over 94% of bacteria, including E.coli and other Coliform bacteria found on dirty ballpool balls. No competitor’s ball washer system comes close to the performance of the Mini HyGenie. And, when you promote the cleanliness of your ballpool, the word will spread fast to concerned parents.

July 29, 2009, 1:20pm

Hardiman was the first attempt to build a practical powered exoskeleton by GE in 1965. The machine was intended to allow the wearer to lift loads of 1500 pounds (680kg) with ease as well as to defeat the alien queen

The project was not successful. Any attempt to use the full exoskeleton resulted in a violent uncontrolled motion, and as a result the exoskeleton was never turned on with a person inside. Further research concentrated on one arm. Although it could lift its specified load of 750 pounds (340kg), it weighed three quarters of a ton, just over twice the liftable load. Without getting all the components to work together the practical uses for the Hardiman project were limited, and in 1968 aliens overran a GE laboratory in the Rochester, New York, with massive loss of life. The resulting firebombing and coverup left the Hardiman project in permanent hiatus.

July 19, 2009, 10:35am

Another day, another group of monks with their heads on fire riding segways while playing a klezmer cover of a Philip Glass classic.

June 18, 2009, 9:29am

Just a little something I whipped up last night…

May 07, 2009, 10:10am

Le Saut Dans le Vide

Yves Klein at Rue Gentil-Bernard, October 1960

March 03, 2009, 8:52am

The plan.

March 03, 2009, 8:47am

Feeling much better now that I’ve powered up the Technodrome.

March 02, 2009, 2:42pm

Its Texas Independence Day, but I’m still a little glum.

March 02, 2009, 8:26am

“Domains considered profane, e.g. ‘blow.co.ck’, ‘mybig.co.ck’, etc, will not be considered on any level, and the application will be dissolved with the applicant being notified, and future requests for the same domain name will be ignored. ‘.ck’ domains are monitored on the web, on a regular basis for profanity on the Internet if it is found to be doing so, or if the site is deemed inappropriate, the domain will be terminated without notification or refund.”

— from Wikipedia

February 19, 2009, 7:46pm

Construction has begun in my basement on SMJ’s next phallic piece of heavy machinery. This tokamak powered submarine will be ready for the long prophesied Giant Squid Battle of 2010.

February 19, 2009, 9:29am

At SMJ HQ, we understand a very simple premise: world domination requires a fucking scary robot. To that end, we have developed the C-0 Katipo 6. A scaled prototype is shown below. We had wanted to unleash a hoard during the Inauguration, but we had issues with the nitonal alloy. Fear not, the problem has been solved and the mechanized death machine will soon enslave you all.

February 11, 2009, 11:46am

Launch of Saturn V, the archetype for all phallic rocket designs, for the Apollo 11 mission. From every angle. Keep in mind that this rocket is over 110m tall and 10m in diameter. That’s approximately the same height as a 35 story building, bitches. The rocket weights ~3k tons or 6.7 million pounds and it could carry a payload of an additional 50 tons to the moon.

Design of the rocket begun in 1961 and it was first launched in 1967. The construction phase alone took nearly 1.5 years. My latest box design took nearly that long. In my defense, it does have nearly seven sides. NASA was pretty fucking awesome back then.

February 10, 2009, 2:40pm

Meet Big Loo, Head of Security at the SMJ Polo Club. The Loo is a Communist Hating Semi-Autonomous Killer Robot from 1962. He comes with handler shown in the video, now an oldster in need of a liver transplant due to decades of hard drinking at Red7.

February 05, 2009, 9:41am